Leaving for the airport in an hour's time. I'm very, very excited!



... Hence this absolutely pointless post.

Ok, I really need to pack.

Feels like the holidays

Going off to Thailand soon, I'm really looking forward to it seeing as I haven't been out of the country for close to two years now. Must remember to blog about it when I come back.

Some things that I've been doing during the post A-levels bliss:
-Fretting over uni applications. I'm pretty much done with my UCAS application but still have to settle the US application, but frankly my heart isn't really in it and I'd much rather study in the UK.
-Watching House. Fantastic show, I cope with the gory parts through a mixture of looking away, pulling my hair out and pinching my nose. By the way I gave up on Orthros no Inu after the first episode.
-Playing Dance Central on Kinect. Exercise!!!
-I actually had a go at yoga thanks to my mother's persuasion... Needless to say, it was a mortifying experience that I'm not too keen to repeat.

big wishes

My Christmas wish for this year is that in 2013 I will be in the UK watching Sherlock on TV. I'm almost done with my UCAS application, but I doubt the universities I've applied to will accept me. Thank goodness my parents seem willing to let me take a foundation course if need be.

A's aren't quite over yet (1 more MCQ paper left!) but I've decided to give up watching Orthros no Inu in favour of House. I've watched the first episode of Othros and it just didn't interest me much (useless, whiny female detective), so... Now, if only my House torrents would download faster!

I certainly don't feel like I've aced my exams, especially Econs. Will be grateful to get away with 2Bs. Unfortunately, I really can't afford a B in GP or E Lit if I want to do a language-related course in the future. And I put in so much work for Chemistry and Maths...

Some things to do after A's

Some things that I absolutely must do after these pesky exams are over:

-Finish reading David Copperfield. I got to the part where his aunt loses her money, and then decided to cease all leisure reading activity because I felt that I should be studying. Unfortunately any time spent by not reading DC ended up on things such as sleeping, internet, staring into blank space, etc.
-Earn money. Really want to save up in case I go overseas for university. Anyway I don't want to depend on my parents too much seeing as I'm turning 18 soon... Who am I kidding, I just want to be able to buy more rubbish.
-Clean out my room. To make space for aforementioned rubbish, and because my room pretty much resembles some kind of homework, textbook and binder file junkyard at the moment.
-Learn Japanese
-Watch Orthros no Inu because Nishikido Ryo is in it and it looks pretty interesting. This can also count as learning Japanese I guess.

I wanted to add exercising to this list too, but that won't happen so soon for sure.

So the preliminary examinations are over, and I can expect to receive the results within the next week or so. After doing the papers I have a vague idea of how I fared, so I don't have any great expectations. Just hope that I'll be able to pass all my subjects and hopefully improve on at least a few of them! I do feel a tinge of sadness that I won't be able to apply for any half-decent overseas university, but what's over is already done. Celebrated the post-examinations period by going out with a few classmates yesterday. We did spend a heck lot of time walking around aimlessly and taking a few wrong turns, but it was enjoyable all the same.

It's just four days after my last paper but I'm slowly going back to work, I certainly do not want to be unprepared for the actual examination, as I always find myself to be.

Great Expectations

I've just had a lazy afternoon which involved me lying on my bed, alternating between reading David Copperfield and snoozing.

Also in the picture above is a necklace that my mum got for me today.

I'm really excited for the Great Expectations film adaptation coming up later this year! Looking forward to seeing Helena Bonham Carter as well as Jeremy Irvine in something other than War Horse, though I suppose it will feel rather odd given the amount of tears that I've shed for his character in War Horse. Also the child actors seem adorable from the trailer!

I've never really gotten round to reading the book in its entirety though, and hope to obtain a copy of it to read before I watch the movie.

dream

Just came back from an hour-long walk with the dog and family. Night time walks are the best during humid August, with the cool wind blowing about...

The past week has been an almost day-to-day existence. For a while I haven't been thinking about revising for A-level exams but wistfully dreaming of studying English (or Liberal Arts or almost anything else for that matter) at UCL (University College London) and roaming the streets of central London, practically drowning in the rich historical and literary landmarks all around me. From Shakespeare and Charles Dickens to Harry Potter to Sherlock the BBC adaptation! I just wish I could be some kind of sponge that can soak up all those experiences and emotions. I'd need to live there, study there, work there for a while to understand; just going there as a tourist would only allow me to skim the surface rather than delve into the living, breathing creation that is London, with its alleyways and monuments and...

But I digress. I need to get a grip on myself and put the upcoming week-long holidays to good use. I do feel that if I still had the chance to study in the UK I would be working a lot harder. Dreams don't make things happen, people do. I have neither the grades nor the financial means to secure my place at any halfway-decent university, but I'm now left with no choice but to press on and hope for a place at the local university.

Some beautiful photos of Edinburgh from this site. Enjoy, my friends.

28 August 2012, Tuesday, 5:53 PM

No school tomorrow. It's not yet six but the skies are already grey. My eyes are drooping because I've had five hours of sleep the past two days.

I think I'll grab a bite and go out for a walk with the dog. Then dinner and a bath, completing a letter to a penpal and finally a movie (The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo, probably) if I can stay awake.

Hope it doesn't rain while I'm out.

-EDIT- Decided not to watch Dragon Tattoo after reading descriptions of the violent scenes... I need to be able to sleep tonight!

one day

Sometimes I wonder if one day I'll be giving some sort of interview and say something like this-

"You know what, I never thought I'd be anything much at all. I was just a kid who never seemed to try hard enough or be good enough in anything. I liked reading, I liked some TV shows, some bands, but never really dared to show my passion to the world. I saw others around me, on TV, in books, and I wanted to be like them. I made dreams, fantasies, of the sort of person I wanted to be. I got decent grades, but never any really good ones, and I constantly feared that I would be resigned to a life of drudgery and mediocrity. Until I was 18, I never felt like I would go anywhere in life. I've dreamed of the things that I've accomplished, but never expected them to really happen. It just goes to show that you can never tell, and your wildest dreams might just come true."

 And now I really do wish that I can say this something like this sometime later in my life, to defy all the expectations I have of myself and live my dreams. Yet it seems so unlikely...

It's not what I had planned

I really felt the urge to blog, but now I find myself struggling to express myself lucidly. I fumble for words to describe myself, but nothing ever comes out quite right. Sometimes I feel ashamed to call myself an A-level English Literature student.

70 odd days left to my A-levels, and I honestly do hope to do well, not for my parents but for myself. Would love to have the opportunity to study overseas, preferably in the UK, but finances and family are an issue.

Welcome to my new blog, if anyone is reading this. I hope you stay with me on this journey, if only for a while.

Some goals, for now-
1. Do well enough in the October A-level exams to get into local uni
2. Blog regularly
3. Catch up on all my reading after the A-levels